Fight

I'm fighting. I'm strong.
But it gets so tiring. But I'll fight.

But I'll fight. Not because I'm strong. But because I love you. I gotta want this. Yeah, I'm hella tired. But I wanna (not because I gotta) be strong for you. I'm gonna fight.
But you gotta understand that I need a little silence too. I need some "It's gonna be alright..." myself. I need to disappear somehow. So don't expect me to snap my fingers and make them all go away. Fighting means there's something going against you. So it's hard. It's a challenge. But unlike yesterday, my diamonds won't be kept hidden in my pocket. Although rough and uncut, I'll be holding them in my hands with pride and passion. Fell to the ground once, and then again, and one more time... because of it. And there goes the fear. I just need to feel better. The haze is making everything seem both chaotic and serene. Yeah, irony is my shadow.

I need you to listen. Just listen. Listen and understand. Need I say this a million times? Hahaha.

I'll fight.
But understand that it is hard. To turn it all around. Still, I'll be smiling at you with all my heart and strength. I'm fighting because I love you. Not because I gotta prove something. I'm fighting so you'd think of me whenever you feel like you're losing grip and got almost nothing to hold on to, and you'll be strong. Be stronger than me. I dare you. Be stronger. Because you are.

I got a song in my heart, and it's one that's subtly losing its melody. I won't let it fade. Silently screaming heart, beat louder! You, listen...

And you, BE STRONGER. FIGHT HARDER. Don't let gravity hold you down. Don't let yourself get stuck in that abyss. Recover. Laugh a little. No, a lot. Smile like there are stars. My advice... BREATHE.

If you're like me and you sometimes feel the need to disappear, go ahead. Find silence. Silence screams the truth. We need it sometimes. When others think we are insane, we know those are the moments when we are sane. When others think you are different, we know it's because they are too. Go ahead and disappear. Sometimes it's okay. I know the feeling. I used to think this was all drama. But hell yeah, this is real. I found myself in it. I think to myself, "So, some do feel like this. So this is the feeling..." And most would take their own life. Now I get where they're coming from, and I've seen myself in a scary familiar scenario. Whatever you may call it, however foolish it may sound, or dramatic, I've witnessed it myself. It is hard. And I also know how hard it is to do this, but
Disappear... Then APPEAR AGAIN.

To appear again
is harder than to disappear. But that's the challenge. I dare you as I dare myself. Wait, I dare you to do better. BE STRONGER.

BREATHE.

Don't regret. Learn.
Don't take your life. How can you appear again if you do?

In a seemingly endless tunnel, hold your breath... And wish. Then you'll find that there's an end to each tunnel.
Disappear... Then APPEAR AGAIN.

One, two, three...

:)